A typical therapy story
] In Hamburg, the family move into an initial reception centre, then into a two-room apartment in a building housing refugees. It is often so loud in the corridor at night that Amin constantly wakes up. The apartment is small and he does his schoolwork on the bed. Since the siblings are unable to avoid each other due to the cramped living conditions, arguments often occur.
and reserved, but from time to time the pent-up emotions burst out of him and he gets angry, screaming and crying. When Amin injures one of his classmates in a fit of rage, the teacher contacts the parents and arranges a meeting to tell them about the HoneyHeroes! service. The parents are open to the offer of help and sign a declaration of consent allowing the teacher to forward the registration to the HoneyHeroes! along with the family’s contact details. Amin has to wait three months. Then the interpreter calls his mother and makes an appointment for an initial consultation.
Both parents come with Amin to the initial consultation. The therapist explains to them how thoughts and feelings can affect the body and behaviour and say that they can help Amin better regulate his fears and anger with psychotherapy. She explains that although she works in a room at the school, she is not employed by the school and all conversations are confidential. Amin finds the courage to talk a little about his anger. Over the course of five diagnostic appointments, Amin and the therapist get to know each other. They complete questionnaires together and – for the first time, in a quiet atmosphere without any distractions or noise – Amin is able to tell someone what scares him and what makes him happy. The parents also come to another meeting and, during the history taking, talk about their life and flight from Syria, but also a great deal about Amin’s development from birth to the present day.
In a meeting with Amin and his parents to discuss the findings, the therapist gives her impression in detail and explains her diagnosis for Amin’s symptoms. She offers the family the opportunity to support Amin in the form of weekly one-to-one therapy sessions and explains to them that accompanying parent–teacher meetings are held every four weeks. The therapy is completely voluntary. Amin and his parents would very much like Amin to go through life with less fear and anger and therefore agree to go to the HoneyHeroes! for therapy. They allow the therapist to share information with the class teacher within the framework of a non-disclosure agreement so that she can also offer Amin good support at school.
Like many children, Amin finds it difficult to express his thoughts and feelings in therapy:
‘When I’m angry, I get hot like an oven. It’s like there’s a fire burning inside me that I can’t put out!’
He draws a full-size picture of his body and is given illustrated cards from the therapist that represent sadness, joy, anger and fear. He is asked to locate the feelings by sticking them to the respective parts of the body in the picture. Amin immediately places anger on the stomach and hands.
Amin and his therapist paint feelings or act them out with toy figures. Together, they explore what feelings do to thoughts and the body and what role they play. Amin learns that emotions indicate one’s needs and understands that fear and anger are early warning signs. In the accompanying parent–teacher meetings, Amin, with the support of his therapist, explains these early warning signs to his parents as well as his class teacher. They now better understand his behaviour and agree on a common strategy: with a hand signal, he can ask his class teacher for a short break. The teacher then gives him time to perform a breathing exercise, during which he thinks about his favourite superhero. This allows Amin to calm down and gradually refocus on the lesson. With common arrangements in place, his parents, his teacher and his therapist are now his most important supporters.
Amin also identifies his strengths in therapy and asks his family, teachers and friends what they think. He records everything in a ‘Book of Strengths’, which he designs with pictures, photos and drawings. Amin is proud of his book and regularly gets it out.
After almost a year, Amin is much braver and more self-confident. He has joined a football club and made friends here and at school. His parents report that there are fewer arguments in the family and that Amin can also sleep well. The teacher also reports that Amin rarely gets angry during class. Amin will soon be able to manage his everyday life without his therapist and she is slowly preparing for the completion of his therapy.